Cat Litter

I was never a cat person. Never a dog person and will never be a hamster/guinea pig/white mice person. I hate pets not because they suck, I just don't like the responsibility that comes with it. Plus, I hate touching dirty things which is why I'll never be a good heir to our family business. Ooops, I digress.

My sister left her cat, Dimitri, under my care for a week. So obviously it's been a busy week. Did I mention I get into violent fits of snizzies every time a cat gets near enough? So there, most of the time I'm either popping pills or sneezing my brains out. It's too bad I'm so allergic to cats because Dimitri is sooo cute and cuddlyriffic!

Lookat him! Lookat him! Looook!

Fattest Hottest Russian Blue, ever!

I literally spent most of my time giving baths to an unwilling subject or scooping cat shit. Cleaning the litter box is just godawful. Personally, this is what hell would be like for me, cleaning litter box full of cat shit. Being a naturally madidirihin person, I could not understand why cat piss smells godawful. Is it sulphur? Is it amonia? I fucking don't get what's in it that makes my eyes water every time I accidentally get a whiff. I cleaned Di's litter box which reeks so bad, it could sober up three tranquilized elephants. No wait, it reeks so bad, it would make Satan himself recoil in disgust. I'm pretty convinced the CIA could use cat piss as an interrogation tool.

Heck, I was scooping cat shit and piss for only a couple of minutes and I was like "God, just kill me. Right here. Do it, I won't mind. They can all go to hell."

But things are not so bad after that. He is such a doll. He just sits there, stares at you accusingly and play with glass marbles all day. By the way, his fur literally turns buttery soft after a good bath... which he hates. He licks his fur till it's back to its old sticky self.