I'm planning to write a book. No, I wasn't given any offers to do it, it's just one of those things that I do just because. The truth is, it's been a lifelong dream of mine to write one. Unfortunately, I do not have any formal training. I know shit when it comes to tricks of the trade and I do not plan to have it released, even if I have a real shot at it. I just want to chennl my energy into something creative. Plus, I think it would help me cope with whatever shit I have going right now.
I even have a title for it and I have a great idea how to start writing the story, it just came to me out of nowhere. I wasn't doing anything remotely inspiring, which is funny when I think about it. The main character's name will be Laurie, a girl in her mid-30's. It starts with her getting a call from her mom and she receive a shocking news that will lead her to a journey back to her bad childhood. It's kinda sappy, actually. She will come into terms with her issues and discover why her life turn out the way it did.
I'm pretty excited to start writing it. Also, I started writing poetry as well. I never told anyone but apart from drawing, writing poetry is a common hobby of mine as a kid. Actually I wrote songs at first. Back in the 90's, I wished one of the popular bands would buy them from me. You know those folded papers that comes with cassette tapes? My cousin had lots of cassette tapes from different bands. Though I didn't listen to any songs from my cousin's collection, nor did I appreciate any of them, I read every one of those folded papers. I discovered that many bands were thanking some people who wrote this song or that song for the band. That's when I hatched a plan to compose songs till I get good enough to send it to my favorite band. Too bad my fave band then was the Moffats (my Gooooodddd, I wanna daiiiiiii) and there was no way for me to send the songs I created plus, I know they wrote their own songs, hehehehhe.
Around the same time, I started writing poems as well. I wrote heinous amounts of it between grade school till college. Most of them got destroyed because our house got flooded in 2004. I stopped writing poems like, five years ago because there's nothing to write about anymore. To be honest, my life just became less and less inspiring as I grew older. Well, I did create a couple every now and then but they are mostly lacking in everything and I just ended up using it to wipe my ass.
But last week I created a blog site and wrote two poems. Two short ones. And no one can make me say where these poems are because I'd rather die in a fire than have everyone know I wrote those shit. I'm not saying I did a bad job at it, I'm okay if people read it as long as the author remains anonymous, y'know?
Anyways... I got a couple of comments about the poems. Which was surprising because the comments came a day after the poems were created. Also, I was so sure I set the damn site in private but turns out I didn't. So there. I didn't approve any of them because I do not want to encourage any emo conversation with strangers. Grabeh, ang sama-sama ko naman, hahaha! But yeah, that's the truth.I don't want people to know where it is all coming from.
I want to create something other than boringass credit card articles. I think I might go insane if I don't. So far, composing poems made me feel better.I will not go as far as say that it made me find inner peace but it is quite therapeutic. Cliche, I know but that's the truth. These days, I'd take anything if it will help me cope with the surrounding bullshit.
I feel sorry that I only got to do this again now because there were many moments in my hiatus that I was struck with inspiration. I never made any efforts to turn inspiration into poems because during those times I felt no need for an outlet. Doing it now takes me back to the good ol' days.
It's a nice feeling.
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