Good Friday Rambling

For the first time I'm spending the holy week all by my lonesome self. I'm trying not to get the depression get to me. I have always hated holy week for as long as I can remember. Well, I do not hate the concept of it, I just hate the silence that comes with it and now that I'm on it alone, it makes the silence even more pronounced.

Oh, well. That's life.

To distract myself, I cooked adobo for the first time. I am the first to admit that I know squat when it comes to cooking and supposedly, adobo should be the first recipe I must master.I scoured for a good adobo recipe online. Will make a post about that later.

I received a call last night, it was Fly Boi. Actually,I have been ignoring his calls after we went out partly because many people I know warned me against seeing him again. I know I shouldn't let other people dictate what I should and should not do, I chose to not see him because I know that these people do have a point. There are so many red flags, it's impossible not to miss them. I can't be with someone who obviously do not care that much. Of course, it's not like I kept my hopes up after we met up, you know? Well, okay. I did. A bit.I thought maybe this time around, things would change but then again I always knew it won't. He will always remain the same person that he was six years ago.  He still continues to live in his past glory. I still continued to be the person I am, jaded and unmoving.

So there, he called and told me he is about to leave. He was already boarding the plane as we talked. It was a brief, cordial call. He told me that we never saw each other after the last time and I can't come up with excuses so I just uttered a lame "yeeaaaah". We told each other to take care and said our good-byes.

I sort of felt a bit sad that he left so soon. We may never see each other again. Or if we do see each other again, he may already be married. God, hopefully when that time comes, I already have a boyfriend otherwise I would die of mortification. Sometimes I catch myself wishing things would turn out much better than it did. But he was stupid and that's that.